Would you cooperate and endorse something you knew was not true?
Religion is a very powerful thing. It has been the source of many things over thousands of years of history. In the context of the small, digitally connected world we live in today it has become somewhat of a sensitive subject, a taboo that isn't discussed openly or casually.
I was born and raised in religion, a specific denomination that I will not name here. The teachings of this religion are strict, absolute and taught as being unquestionable. It is the thoughts and will of a deity, interpreted by a select group of men through infallible but invisible divine inspiration. The final goal is gaining a ticket to an infinitely long life in a utopian fantasy land. From a logical perspective it seems farfetched, but it's such an alluring hope that it can be easy to see how someone could become blinded to reasonable thought and embrace such an idea.
I was somewhat blindly following these teachings, not spending time considering their credibility until a few years ago when I gained an interest in biology.
Life on this world originated from a single common ancestor through a process of evolution primarily by means of natural selection. It is a fundamental fact of biology and the evidence is clear and overwhelming.
I came to understand that after reading more books than some people do in a lifetime. From Charles Darwin's seminal On the Origin of Species by Means of Natural Selection, his exhaustive follow up The Descent of Man and Selection in Relation to Sex to a large variety of modern titles including The Greatest Show on Earth and The Blind Watchmaker by renowned biologist Richard Dawkins. I also watched many documentaries including several by David Attenborough, my favourite being Rise of Animals: Triumph of the Vertebrates produced in 2013.
Physical books like it's 1999.
Look at the evidence in the development of the human embryo. Early in development a tail begins to form, the jaw starts to be like that of a reptile before the bones separated out to integrate into the ears. The recurrent laryngeal nerve starts to lay the groundwork for water dwelling gills until the local rules contained in the honed and refined DNA develop further to forge a human form.
Even a fully grown adult shows evidence of their distant ancestry. Look at the spine, clearly built like an upright segmented swing bridge - extremely stupid if it was designed, but it makes perfect sense when going back over our genealogy to distant ancestors that walked on four limbs. Look around in nature, how every mammal species is derived from the same structure - crudely only differing in size and proportions.
Changes in a species come about over time through mutation, small differences in genetic code that arise during reproduction. Over millions of years these small changes accumulate to shape living beings to best exploit their environment for survival and further reproduction. Mutation is a documented, observable and testable rule that is a foundation of life science.
Humanity, along with all other life on this humble world, did not come from extreme random chance or the hand of an invisible deity. The beautiful variety and complexity you see is the result of billions of years of accumulation through the most simple process of trial and error, survival of the best. People that, despite being presented with the evidence, deny evolution are as deluded as those that believe the earth is flat.
Just imagine ancient man looking up at the stars thousands of years ago. The only way they knew to understand origins was by extrapolating from their own experience. Their newly evolved minds thought these points of light must be forged by a someone's hand, as that is the only way they knew something could be made. But no, stars are formed by a process without a guiding deity.
The fixed and universally constant law of gravity collects the ultra abundant Hydrogen gas together. Once enough has accumulated tightly together the real party starts. The overall mass of the gas squeezes in on itself overriding the natural state of the individual Hydrogen atoms and, over a three stage process involving the converting of protons into neutrons, making a different element - Helium. In this process the overall energy required to bind the atom together is reduced. This excess is forced out as exotic, energy rich particles that lead to things like the heat and light stars give out.
Ancient man several thousand years ago did not know this. They had not seen the experiments done by scientific pioneers like Ernest Rutherford, they had not seen the calculations done and the results of detonating a thermonuclear device. They did not understand the reality around them and resorted to the supernatural to explain what they saw. Believing the Earth, Sun and stars were assembled by an invisible intelligence requires wilful ignorance and a complete disregard of the evidence.
Understanding the Magic of Reality makes it more beautiful
As you might expect this caused a bit of a crisis.
Before I continue I have to make something very clear: I do not have any problem with people who choose to believe in a god. I have absolutely no issues with associating with such people, learning from them and most importantly giving them respect.
Unfortunately this isn't the case for everyone. The religion I was raised in and that most of my family is still apart of practices shunning or casting out of people that stop following their doctrine. If I am open about the facts of biology - the magic of reality - and discuss it with anyone, no matter how discretely, I risk being cast out as a heretic and an apostate. The other option is to explicitly condone something that is a lie.
But my biggest fear is one of disappointment. My father is someone I greatly care for. He has done an excellent job raising me and my family and I continue to have a close and happy relationship with him. But now I fear that is at risk. If I can't reason with him not only is there a risk of the relationship breaking down, but that he and most of his friends and family will see me as an embarrassment and a failure.
There is a tremendous temptation to curl up in a corner and give in to despair. It's so appealing, the easy thing to do! But no, I choose to fight it. I rely on my strength and integrity to push through and keep a positive attitude. I don't mind being alone, it's not something I dread. My social and interpersonal skills have always been lacking, I can struggle with conversations and stumble over my words. If introverts had a club I'd be the most qualified but first in line not to join it. From a certain perspective that's a fortunate coincidence.
And how could I ever loose hope while knowing that I am apart of The Greatest Show on Earth? The world we live in is full of wonder and awe. Everything from the land, sea and sky to the stars and galaxies beyond are crafted by the majesty of the universal laws of physics. It is fascinating, and understand it could be the ultimate ambition of humanity, the final goal of our evolved consciousness.
And that is worth continuing for. If you are struggling through something similar to this please get in contact with me.
I will provide assistance if I can and I'm happy to answer any questions you have. It can feel like there is no good options, that every choice has a detrimental consequence. I will not judge anyone for the decisions they choose to make. Comment below here, direct message me on Twitter - @aaronights or email me aaronights at gmail.